Running Time: 90 min.
Production Date: None given
Director: Von Gabriel
Cast: Bianca, Brenda, Cameron, Cinthia, Jane, Lucie, Nataly, Sandra, Tanya, and Tasha
Audio /Video Quality: As usual with Unparalleled Productions' releases, the technical aspects leave a lot to be desired. The audio ranges from being decent down to a little below 1980s home video standards where the camera and background can be heard more than the performers. The video is presented in anamorphic widescreen and isn't much better. It often seems about as clear as a VHS copy and also has areas that seem downright jumpy. Combine this with a bit of uneven lighting, a fair amount of camera motion, and an aspect ratio that often seems like it's not quite right and you have a movie where there's a good chance you're head's going to hurt before it's done either from watching the movie or banging your face against a table for picking it up.
The Movie: If the Men Are Away the Girls Will Play collects five lesbian scenes featuring European talent.
|Scene 1 – Lucie and Sandra|
Bottle blonde and brunette Lucie and Sandra (I'm not sure who's who) bend over to show off their asses before checking each other out and kissing while wearing a little minor lingerie. They happily check each other out while helping each other strip down, and get in a little titty sucking and pussy play as they go. They play with each other's pussy a little as they break out a pink and green vibe that they suck and put to work on themselves. After a bit the brunette reaches over to fuck the bottle blonde with the green vibe, and then lays back so the bottle blonde can fuck her in return with the pink one. The girls go back to fucking themselves with their toys to finish things off before sucking their toy clean and waving goodbye.
|Scene 2 – Cinthia and Tanya|
Dirty blondes Cinthia and Tanya start things out kissing and mugging the camera while going after each other's tits. One lays back for the other to suck her tits and eat her pussy before returning the favor with the other as she gets on all fours. They add a little lube and a pink dildo to the mix for one girl before the other gets treated to a silver vibe and a bit of lube both while on her back and on all fours. While on all fours the bustier dirty blonde adds a second toy to her ass for a technical DP and then continues to let the other girl DP her with the toys as she goes back to her back again. Finally they kiss and wave goodbye.
|Scene 3 – Brenda and Tasha|
Raven tressed beauties Brenda and Tasha start things out with a bit of kissing and groping, and quickly go after each other's exposed tits. The lighter skin girl slides under the darker skinned girl to eat her and fuck her with a dildo before laying back to let the other girl reciprocate in kind. She even lets the other girl pile drive her with the toy and give it to her from behind as they each mix in a few tastes of the toy along with a little camera mugging. The darker girl straddles the lighter girl's face to have her bald pussy eaten and fingered before laying back and fucking herself with it as the other girl holds her legs back and tries to lick around the area of her pussy and toy. Naturally they close things out with a bit of kissing.
|Scene 4 – Bianca and Jane|
Bottle blondes Bianca and Jane start out in the bathroom with one eating the other's pussy as she sits back on the stool wearing a little cream lingerie and mixing in plenty of glances to the camera. She's rewarded with a bit of titty sucking as her pink lingerie is pulled to the side as well as a few slaps for her ass. They take to the bathroom floor so that she can also be thanked with a bit of tongue and finger action for her bald pussy along with a little more titty sucking. The girl in pink hands her a toy so she can get a little more action for her pussy before the girl in cream moves back onto the stool to fuck herself with a bigger toy while the girl in pink sucks one of her tits. They work each other over with the toys a bit more with the girl in pink even getting in a little toilet time before closing things with a kiss and waving goodbye to the camera.
|Scene 5 – Cameron and Nataly|
Blonde and brunette Cameron and Nataly (and once again I can't say who's who) start out in sexy swimsuits by the pool letting their hands wander around each other while kissing a bit and mugging the camera. Naturally they move on to suck each other's tits and help each other strip down before the blonde lays back to let the brunette eat her. The brunette lets her suit get stripped off so the blonde can eat her pussy and fuck it with a pink vibe as she lays back by the pool and gets on all fours. The blonde hands the brunette a metallic red vibe so she can return the favor before they close things with a kiss and a wave.
If The Men Are Away, the Girls Will Play is a very disappointing release. The only good thing I can say about this release is that the girls are definitely hot, and occasionally look like they're into each other. Beyond that, the scenes are beyond generic, poorly shot, and generic. There's absolutely nothing special about this one outside of a very poor presentation, which makes it more of a short bus kind of special rather than the special you want to look for. You can easily skip If The Men Are Away, the Girls Will Play without feeling like you missed anything other than an hour and a half of your life at the most.
The Extras: The only extra is a photo gallery lasting about three and a quarter minutes.
Final Thoughts: Skip it.
Note to Unparalleled Productions / Juicy Entertainment: If you're going to put out movies with this bad of a presentation, please drop the price to about a quarter of what it is now to make up for it.
If you have any questions or comments, please e-mail me.
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