Ah, the 70ís. The pre-Golden age of porn. Back
when mustaches were mandatory and the films were
grainier than my ass crack after a trip to the
beach. Caballero digs WAY back into the vaults
and re-releases Heavy Equipment on DVD. Was it
worth the effort? Uh, hmm, errÖ it depends.
First things first, the picture quality is awful.
I mean really, really bad. The video is very
grainy, and the lighting is extremely dark in a
few places. It isnít mentioned anywhere on the
DVD, but I could swear that this was filmed in
3D. There are many places where you can see the
standard red-blue double image required for 3D.
This seems to happen most frequently when
projectiles are coming straight at the screen.
Penises, hands, dumbells, things like that. I
donít have 3D glasses, though, so I canít confirm
anything. If this wasnít done intentionally,
then the picture quality is even worse that I
Our story (thatís right, there is a story here!)
starts out with our hero, the geeky Chester,
working at an adult bookstore. His boss is a
jerk, customers are obnoxious, but Chester does
the best he can, trying to make ends meet. Some
bum wants to sell some old books to the store,
but the store owner rudely chases him away.
Chester feels sorry for the guy and gives him a
couple bucks. The bum is overjoyed for the
generous handout, and gives Chester a special
book about magic.
At home, Chester is mesmerized by the book,
especially a chapter about making your fondest
wishes come true. Apparently, all you have to do
is burn an image of what you want, and eat the
ashes. Chester obliges, and POOF, he turns into
a hunk (Jack Wrangler). He quickly explores his
new found body, and discovers not only does he
have a killer body (by 70ís standards), but a
huge cock (by anyoneís standards)! Not content
to be by himself, he performs another little
sťance, and all of a sudden is accompanied by a
magic floating penis (!??!). He then jerks off
to climax while the disembodied penis hovers over
his chest. Ok, that was a bit weird. What the
hell were these guys smoking back then?
Chester decides he need to show off his new body,
so he heads down to the beach, where he runs into
the Christy twins. He follows then into the john
for some quick glory hole action. The Christy
twins honestly are not much to look at. This
scene is pretty much all oral. There is a little
bit of anal action at the end, but it looked kind
of faked to me.
Next up, Chester heads off to the local gym, to
meet up with the hunky owner. Chester is clad in
a sweaty jockstrap only, and the owner quickly
pushes it aside so he can suck on Chesterís big
meat. After some 69 action, Chester (Jack
Wrangler) lies on his stomach so the owner can
jump on top and give him the hot beef injection.
Strange, I would have pegged Jack as the top in
this scene, but I am always pleased to see the
bigger guy get fucked. This is probably the
hottest of the 4 scenes.
Still not satisfied, Chester stops by a
construction site where Al Parker and Chris Adams
are sitting around naked. All three men are very
well hung, and Al is particularly veiny. Chester
services Alís tool., while Chris slurps
Chesterís. After a little fucking, the scene
ends with a small circle jerk.
The movieís not quite over yet, though. There is
a story here, after all, the they even remember
to tie up a few loose ends. The big question is,
Is it worth the money? Doing a quick price
search, youíll see that Heavy Equipment is
selling for a mere 12 bucks. If you bought this
purely for sexual content, you would probably be
disappointed. I strongly recommend against fast
forwarding straight to the sex scenes. You will
miss all the charm of the film. The sex isnít
all that hot, anyway. There arenít any oral
cumshots that you see so much in 80ís films. The
penetration shots are few and far between. If
you buy this DVD, it would be for more than just
the sex. It would be to get a glimpse at a lost
era. Back when story mattered, and movies had
actual characters with personalities. It is
very interesting to see how far we have come in
gay porn, as well as what we have lost.
The opinions expressed in this review of Heavy Equipment from P.M. Productions are not necessarily the opinions of Adult DVD Talk. Adult DVD Talk provides a public forum for consumers to post their DVD reviews. Adult DVD Talk does not edit these reviews.