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Dallas: A XXX Parody
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Dallas: A XXX Parody

Studio: Adam & Eve
Category:  Feature film
Directed by:
Starring: , , , , , , , ,
Released on: 
Where to buy:DVD NewDVD RentStreaming/Download
astroknight's ratings for Dallas: A XXX Parody:
Overall Rating 4 stars
Dallas: A XXX Parody overall rating 4 stars
Female Looks Dallas: A XXX Parody Female looks rating 4 stars
Male Looks Dallas: A XXX Parody Male looks rating 3.5 stars
Sex Dallas: A XXX Parody Sex rating 4 stars
 
Plot/Acting Dallas: A XXX Parody Plot/Acting rating 4 stars
Extras Dallas: A XXX Parody DVD Extras rating 4.5 stars
Audio/Video Quality Dallas: A XXX Parody A/V Quality rating 4.5 stars
Worth$16.00
Rating Scale
Reviewed by astroknight  on  3/7/2013

Running Time: 128 min.

Production Date: 9 / 6 8 / 2011

Director: Andre Madness

Cast: Alexis Ford, Bobbi Starr, Brooklyn Lee, India Summer, Bill Bailey, Eric Masterson, James Deen, Michael Vegas, and Ryan McLane in sexual roles along with Kiki Daire, Dino Bravo, Herschel Savage, Jack Lawrence, James Bartholet, Ralph Long, and more in non-sex roles

Audio /Video Quality: The technical aspects are nicely done. The audio is clear and well balanced and I didn't notice any background noises. The video is presented in anamorphic widescreen and also looks shows some nice care. It's clear, well lit, and has a good hand on the camera.

The Movie: There were few dramatic television shows that dominated the eighties like CBS did Friday nights with Dallas. The show revolved around the Ewing family and their oil holdings, with much of it being a battle between ethical Bobby (played here by James Deen) and his scheming brother J.R. (here played by Eric Masterson). Here, Andre Madness, David Lord, and Adam & Eve parody the iconic prime time soap opera right down to a cover that updates the DVD cover of Dallas' seventh season with the parody's porn players.

Scene 1 India Summer and James Deen

After giving each other a few hints with a titty flash and sex toys, MILFalicious brunette India gets busy with James on the bed. They kiss with James happily mixing in a little titty sucking and pussy play before moving down to eat her box. He continues to eat India from behind before she eagerly strokes and sucks his cock in return. James fucks India doggie style before letting her suck and stroke him a bit more and then moving on with some missionary work and spooning. India rolls on top for a reverse cowgirl ride before James pulls out to spray an impressive load over her bush and stomach. She lets him go back in for a few more pumps so she can have one last orgasm before they close things out with a kiss.



Scene 2 Alexis Ford and Bill Bailey

Hot and busty bottle blonde Alexis jumps out of a stable to surprise Bill before they head to a few blanket covered bales of hay to have some fun. Bill slides off her riding boots to suck her toes before moving on to tongue her holes and play with her pussy. Alexis drops down to suck his cock in return before bending over the hay bales to let Bill tongue her a little more before he starts fucking her. She works in a little more oral action for Bill as they continue to fuck standing up, and is rewarded with a little more pussy licking as Bill lays her back on the hay bales and continues to bone her. Finally Bill pops on Alexis' feet and lets her rub it around.



Scene 3 Bobbi Starr and Michael Vegas

When hot brunette Bobbi goes whoring out at the bars and drops her keys, they're picked up by cowboy Michael who refuses to let her drive home and instead takes her off for meaningless sex. He carries her away and takes her out back to kiss his way around her while helping her strip down. He sucks her tits and eats her holes with a bit of finger play mixed in before Bobbi helps him strip down and works him over orally in return. Bobbi lays back for Michael to fuck her missionary style before laying him back, putting on his hat, and riding him cowgirl style with a little more sucking and stroking mixed in. They also fuck doggie style and spoon before Michael pulls out to pop on her bush.



Scene 4 Alexis Ford and Ryan McLane

When Alexis doesn't like her midterm grade, she pays a visit to professor Ryan wearing a trenchcoat over a sexy purple and black bra and panty set. Ryan can't resist diving into her titties and kisses her before settling back in his chair to let Alexis mouth his manhood and titty fuck him. She gets up to ride him reverse cowgirl style before turning around for the traditional cowgirl. Alexis bends over the desk to let Ryan take her from behind before dropping down to take his testicular treats over her tatas.



Scene 5 Brooklyn Lee and Eric Masterson

Eric heads over to hook up with Brooklyn after giving her a call to let her know to be ready for him. He finds her in a sexy robe, bra, and panties on the couch and moves in to kiss her and eat his way between her thighs. Brooklyn gobbles his knob in return before getting on all fours for Eric to take her doggie style. She lets Eric fuck her bow and arrow style before riding him in cowgirl. They also spoon before Brooklyn takes a nice facial finish.



I'll readily admit that I'm probably not the best person to review a parody of Dallas, as growing up in the eighties our house was apparently one of about fifteen across the country that wasn't tuned in to see what machinations the Ewing family was up to. That said, with a show as iconic as Dallas was it was impossible to not have a little knowledge about it. Dallas XXX feels like a very nice porn version of the prime time powerhouse. Yes, there's a bit of overacting here in places, but that seems par for the course with any kind of soap opera. James and Eric do a very nice job as the feuding Ewing brothers with Eric looking like he's having a lot of fun as J.R. The female cast also does a very nice job, with Alexis looking smoking hot and turning out two very solid sex scenes. India starts things out very nicely with James, and Bobbi's scene with Michael and Brooklyn's romp with Eric also worked well for me. The story is fairly light, but doesn't seem too far off from what one would normally get in an episode of Dallas, and the experience is helped out nicely by solid camera work as well as some very nice care towards the music. Dallas XXX is a very enjoyable porn parody that should please fans of the original.

The Extras: A second DVD is devoted entirely to extras, starting with trailers and a photo gallery lasting about eight minutes. There's also behind the scenes featurettes, a bonus scene, an alternate ending, and commercials.

The alternate ending lasts nearly three minutes. This was a fairly predictable alternate ending that has a lot of fun playing with some of the auora that surrounds Dallas.

The blooper reel lasts a little over nine minutes. You get plenty of flubbed lines and crack-ups as well as a little fun around the set. The blooper reel seems a little stretched out, but still has some fun sequences.

The behind the scenes featurette lasts forty minutes and features Barrett Blade behind the camera. Alexis starts out talking about her role as well as her new titties and the aromatic location before a bit of working on the dialogue in the movie. Eric talks about his natural talent to play J.R., Brooklyn's magical vagina, and how he doesn't cup the balls right while sucking dick to get the right awards recognition. India Summer starts to chatting about the trouble people seem to have with her name as well as her role in the movie and being a fan of the original show. Michael talks about her theories on pussy and never seeing the Dallas. Bobbi talks about her role in the movie, catching a little of the original, working her way between versions, and the big bush. Herschel starts out talking about still being alive despite quitting smoking, life being different when you're on TV, and a bit of his time in porn. There's also a bit of Alexis posing for stills before the Ralph Long cross-dressing extravaganza and a bit of Bill Bailey posing for stills and a James Deen shower moment. This is a solid behind the scenes featurette.

Bonus Scene Kayden Kross and Tommy Gunn

The bonus scene comes from Rawhide 2. After kissing smoking hot blond Kayden outside, Tommy heads to a cabin with her where they kiss a little more and he sucks he way around her tits. Kayden happily sucks and strokes his cock in return before Tomnmy strips off her panties to eat her nearly bald box. He fucks her missionary style and spoons her. Tomnmy also takes her from behind before spooning her and popping on her bush.



Condom Usage: None

Final Thoughts: If you have pleasant memories of the original, odds are you'll find plenty to like in this porn parody as well.

Note to Adam & Eve: It's nice to see you continue to support bigger budget features like this including the case you put into the entire package. Thank you.

If you have any questions or comments, please e-mail me.

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