The Little Details
Running Time: 90 min. (including the seventh “Bonus Scene”)
Production Date: 6 / 13 / 2005
Director: Brett Maverick
Cast: Jassie, Katja Kassin, Kody Coxxx, Lauren Phoenix, Melissa Lauren, Naudia Nyce, Nicki Hunter, Billy Glyde, Rick Masters, and Tommy Gunn
The Short Story
Initial Expectations: The little I've seen of this one has been far from impressive. I just can't get my hopes up here.
Initial Reaction: With how he ruined this one, Brett Maverick shouldn't even be allowed near a camera at family functions.
Who Should Watch It : Anybody who likes to hear the guy behind the camera
Who Should Avoid It: Anybody wanting well shot anal action
The Technical Stuff
Audio /Video Quality: The technical aspects don't make it to the average mark. The audio is balanced pretty well and there are few background noises. The video is presented in the full frame format and is the major problem here. It has a soft and tinted look that just doesn't look right, and there's a fair amount of camera motion.
False Advertising: While the front cover claims ”100% Anal-Pounding Action”, the back cover lists Jassie in the cast as well as very clearly showing her in action. On the DVD, however, Jassie doesn't do anal and her scene is labeled as a bonus scene after the movie pops up “The End”. This looks like a desperate attempt for somebody to try to save their butt from people whining about Jassie's scene not being an anal scene, but when her “Bonus Scene” is needed to make the time limit on the cover and it's found in the main movie chapter menu instead of with the other bonus scene found in the main menu it's awfully hard to not see it as part of the movie. Regardless, somebody fucked up beyond just letting Brett Maverick have a camera. I'm deducting a half point from the overall score because of this.
Menus: The main menu blends the cover still of Katja with a little generic animation for an okay at best first impression. The chapter menu lets you choose a scene based on a small clip of each scene as well as including a link for the Jassie “Bonus Scene”.
The FeatureAss Pumpers keeps things fairly simple. Each scene starts out with Brett Maverick talking with the girls and getting them to show off a bit. The scene then cuts to the girls having sex with Brett continuing to talk through varying amounts of the scene.
|Scene 1 – Kody Coxxx and Rick Masters|
Cody starts out in a pair of multicolor polka dotted panties and a white cut off wife beater chatting with Brett as he checks her out and runs off at the mouth. He has her crawl around in a circle and show off, and as Rick arrives he jokingly tells Rick to go home as he plays with her tits. They use lipstick to give a little guidance on where Rick should go on Kody's ass before the scene cuts to him eating her pierced pussy. Rick pulls his cock out for Kody to suck as Brett continues to run off at the mouth before he starts fucking her pussy missionary style. They cut to Rick spooning her ass as she fingers her pussy before Rick fucks her ass from behind and pops on her face. Almost the instant the cum hits Kody's face, the scene cuts out.
This scene didn't even make it to the average mark. Kody looks to be having fun, but Brett is annoying as heck and doesn't seem to have the slightest clue that nobody cares about him. The lipstick “fun” was all the more annoying to me, and although Kody did take it in the ass very well, I couldn't wait for this scene to get done. This scene started the movie off on a very low note.
|Scene 2 – Lauren Phoenix and Rick Masters|
Lauren, in a purple bra and panties along with tan fishnets, talks about the need for a cock down her throat, how her ass has been growing, and loving raunchy anal, among other things, before Rick dives into her pussy orally while Brett runs off at the mouth. Although Lauren brings up Rick licking her ass, he never does, so she sucks his cock and then hops up to ride it cowgirl style. After a couple poor editing cuts the cock works its way in and out of her ass reverse cowgirl style as well as in doggie. Lauren also lays back for Rick to ream her rectum missionary style before finishing it up with a nice facial.
This is an okay at best scene. Lauren looks great and takes it up the ass very well, but Rick doesn't bring a lot to the scene and Brett mouths off enough at the start of the scene I couldn't help but wish that somebody would jam a cock in it to shut him up. The camera work and editing is also weak, and if the scene makes it to the average mark it just barely makes it.
|Scene 3 – Naudia Nyce and Billy Glyde|
Brunette Nadia starts her scene out in a little pinstripe skirt with a red fishnet top and stockings. She chats with Brett a little about anal before the scene cuts to her sucking Billy's cock while Brett continues to talk. She takes him deep into her throat before riding him cowgirl style with the scene quickly cutting to Billy boning her from behind as Nadia encourages him to finger her ass while he fucks her. She lays back for him to fuck her ass missionary style before getting on all fours for him to let her have it doggie style. Finally Billy pulls out and pops a load on Nadia's crack.
This is actually a tolerable scene. Brett keeps his mouth shut for most of it and lets Nadia do what she does so well. Nadia normally doesn't do much for me, but here she does a nice job with some good energy and vocals. The camera work leaves a bit to be desired as usual, and once again the editing is a little weak. This is a pretty average scene.
|Scene 4 – Katja Kassin and Billy Glyde|
Katja, with her hair a brighter shade of red, starts her scene out in a little black and pink top with a pink skirt showing off her ass and talking about anal sex. She strips down while Brett talks before the action cuts to Billy eating her ass while Brett talks even more. Billy also mixes in a little pussy eating before Katja gets on top so he can continue to tongue her holes while she sucks his cock. Katja rides him reverse cowgirl style before letting him fuck her ass missionary style complete with plenty of gapes. Finally Billy moves up and gives Katja a nice facial finish and she swallows it down.
This is another scene that almost makes it to the average mark. Katja looks great and does a great job with the anal. Once again, between the poor camera work and Brett Maverick's mouth it just couldn't get to the average mark.
|Scene 5 – Melissa Lauren and Tommy Gunn|
Melissa, still in her blonde phase, starts out chatting about being nineteen and why European porn girls are more eager to do anal. She shows off a little before admiring Tommy's cock as it pokes his pocket out of his jeans. Tommy checks out her tits and tongues her ass before fucking Melissa's face as she puts out plenty of spit. Melissa rides him reverse cowgirl style before laying back for a bit of missionary, and then lets Tommy take her ass from behind. She rides it cowgirl style with a few tastes of her ass from Tommy's cock, and finishes things up letting him pop on her ass and reaching back to take a few tastes.
This is an okay scene. Melissa looks great, as usual, and takes it up the ass extremely well, which is also nothing new. The scene is held back by the video work and editing, however, with the video having an odd tint and softness to it while the editing is very choppy and leaves you feeling like you missed a lot of the action. Combined it gives the scene a look that's so amateurish that it's painful. This scene only makes it to the average mark due to Melissa's great anal skills, and barely does it at that.
|Scene 6 – Nicki Hunter and Billy Glyde|
Bottle blonde Nicki starts her scene out on a pool table playing with the balls in a baby blue tied off wifebeater and short cutoff jeans talking about loving balls, her love of anal, and her first anal experience. The camera man continues to mouth off and check Nicki out as she starts kissing and playing with Billy, and soon after Billy's between her legs eating her holes. Nicki sloppily sucks his cock in reciprocation and lets Billy fuck her tits before getting on all fours and letting him fuck her pussy doggie style. She also takes it missionary style before letting Billy bone her behind doggie and reverse cowgirl style. Finally, Nicki gets down for an enthusiastic facial finish.
This scene leaves plenty to be desired. Nicki looks great and shows some great enthusiasm, but Brett Maverick all but ruins the scene with his incessant yapping at the start of the scene. It was so bad that I couldn't help but get out the remote, and although he seemed to let up on it once the fucking started, I couldn't help but keep fast forwarding sporadically through the scene in fear of hearing his voice again. Nicki Hunter should give Brett Maverick a solid kick in the nuts for ruining her scene like it did.
|”Bonus Scene” (Scene 7) – Jassie and Tommy Gunn|
Cute brunette Jassie starts out admiring the balls on a pool table while talking about Vegas and size before the scene cutes to Tommy licking and fingering her pussy. It quickly cuts to her sucking his cock before she gets up to ride him reverse cowgirl style. Jassie also lets Tommy spoon her pussy before laying back to take it missionary style. She also watches in a mirror as Tommy fucks her from behind before sucking Tommy a bit more and then riding him cowgirl style. Jassie lets him fuck her a little more missionary style before he pops on her face.
As I said in the False Advertising section of the review, this looks to be a desperate attempt to try to deflect the fact that Jassie's scene isn't an anal scene and it doesn't come close to working. She does do a nice job taking on Tommy and the scene works better than many others in the release due to Brett Maverick shutting his piehole much quicker than he does in all the others. The camera work is okay, and the scene starts out with a bit of an odd and choppy feeling due to it cutting from the tease to the pussy eating to the cocksucking rather than letting the scene feel like it was getting there on its own. Thankfully Jassie is as cute as ever and puts out a nice fuck to help the scene work its way to the average mark. As usual, this could have been a very good scene but it was held back by very poor direction.
It's been a long time since I've seen an anal movie as bad as Ass Pumpers is. The sad thing is, it didn't have to be nearly as bad as it is. With the exception of Jassie (of course), the girls all put out nice anal scenes and there's nothing that really stands out about the job the performers do. The problems are all behind the camera. From poor camera handling, weak and choppy editing, and most of all Brett Maverick's babbling throughout the movie, the stars don't really have a chance. Ass Pumpers is a complete disappointment.
The Extra StuffThe photo gallery lasts about ten minutes and annoyingly pans and zooms around each photo for about seven seconds each time. I detest this style and barely made it into the gallery because of it. There's also a pair of bonus scenes and web info.
|Bonus Scene – Alexa and Billy Glyde|
The bonus scene comes from Tres Equis and starts with Alexa bent over on a bed in a little turquoise and white outfit showing off as Brett runs off at the mouth. They take a few moments to admire her pierced titties before she shows off her pussy. Soon after Billy arrives and drops down to lick and finger her pussy as Brett keeps talking. Alexa sucks Billy's bone in return before letting him bury it in her pussy doggie style, and then rolls over to take it missionary style. She also rides him cowgirl style before taking a nice facial.
This is an okay scene. Alexa is cute and looks to have some nice chemistry with Billy. They keep things moving nicely and the camera work isn't bad. What is bad, however, is Brett Maverick's mouth, which is annoying as heck and severely held the scene back even though he finally shut up after the first three or four minutes. Alexa shows some nice promise here, and I hope to see more of her when she works for a decent director.
The Down -n- Dirty Sex Stuff
Themes: Straight, tease, anal, ass to mouth, rimming (male > female), and swallowing
Raincoat Factor: High
Condom Usage: None
The Bottom Line:Currently, many of Bad Seed's DVDs can be found online for between about $15 and $25 with a few stores offering them near the low end. Don't even think of paying the low end for this one, and even renting it might be a touch high. The action is completely forgettable and the technical aspects are weak. There's a little effort put into the extras, but it isn't too special either. This is a dud of a release.
Note to Bad Seed: I hope you never allow Brett Maverick to perform a job in porn above jizzmopper after the job he did here.
If you have any questions or comments, please e-mail me .
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